Sacrificial Mothering

Caleb has been at my mom's house for the past two nights.  It's been sad not to see him, but, wow am I accomplishing things!  I did more yesterday than I would get done in two weeks around here!

The most interesting part of not having him--this is the very fist time he's done this--is realizing how much he really does demand from me on a daily basis.  Even my thinking is constantly interrupted!  It makes me feel alot better about the things I do get done, despite the parenting!

I think, somewhere deep in my heart, I start to doubt my worth, and myself, when I have repeated "in between" days, or even just a whole week where I don't get the laundry and the mopping done, etc.  The world tells us that, as women, we can have it all, do it all, and still come out looking like supermodels.  But it simply isn't that way.  Motherhood is, ultimately, a complete sacrifice of who we are as women.  It's saying, "My life for yours," to our kiddos each and every day, in tiny little ways:  playing with him instead of reading or talking to friends, disciplining correctly instead of losing your temper or letting things slide, doing the housework, the cooking, the teaching, the planning and the loving instead of getting a tan and going to the gym.

So, you know it's really happening when you do look terrible, or you feel emotionally raw and drained.  Or your tummy still jiggles from your last pregnancy.  Those things mean you're doing something other with your time--giving it to someone else besides yourself.  That's what being a Mom is all about.